On Dealing With Cancer

"In August 2005, after a year of chemical therapy to get a raging prostate under enough control, and downsized enough, to give full-on radiation a chance for success, I was scheduled for kick-off surgery. With a PSA off the charts, and a mean Gleason of "9," I was scared. After a year of trying to be Attitude Guy, it was on me: I was about to take the step that determined whether I lived or died. All the bottled up fear came racing in.
 
Then Mary arrived. She had talked to one of my groups a month earlier, and was to talk to another executive group the day before my surgery. I called her, and asked if we could meet the day before. She found time on her schedule, a full three hours, to meet at a local Mimi's and help me understand how managing my thoughts could matter in the situation I faced. It was Mary, full-on, what she had come to understand, how she applied her ideas, how her approach had helped her survive her own great loss, and what my thought choices were as I jumped and pulled the cord.
 
On that summer afternoon, Mary hauled my mind back from the abyss. She reinforced my own raggedy thought management notions, and gave me a focus that changed mightily how I "made it through," not only the so-called "minor surgery," but the brutal beating administered by ten weeks of radiation, and the even worse lashing that can come from raw fear. Was fear abolished? No. Was it fun? No. But it was managed, and I could put my energy on living, and once again, I am!
 
Looking back, it seems so simple. Nonsense! We each rue our inability to get out of the funk, the dread of being out of control emotionally. We each wish there could be a way to prevent the slide, or stop the slide, or find our way back from the slide.

There is. A basic way to look at, and manage, what we think. Which dictates how we feel. And ultimately, what we do. It is called Managing Thought – How Do Your Thoughts Rule Your World? Get it. Read it. Live it. Within those pages, there is a whole new opportunity to find your way through. To decide on what you think. To own you.
 
Thanks, Mary!"

Lawrence M. Cassidy
Chair – Executive Coach and Mentor
Vistage International, Inc

Creating Intentions Together as a Couple

My husband Rick and I have already added your "formula" to a weekly ritual that we do.  Every Sunday we pick an "angel card" (I'm sure you've seen them) and then become aware/add whatever behavior or principal that word indicates to our lives throughout the week. Yesterday, I chose "discernment" and Rick chose "responsibility".  I suggested that instead of just talking about what those meant with each other, to do the 7 question format - "If I'm being ____ what am I doing? Then, of course, reading our answers to each other.  Then we chose the top 2 and decided that during the week we were going to apply the "7" to those as well.  Doing this added so much more to our exchange - AND we had fun (no judgment).

Denise Martin
San Jose, California

On Raising Money for a Not-For-Profit

Managing my thoughts has truly enhanced my life. I used to tell myself that I could not possibly ask people for money. I could give you all the variations on this theme, however those are old dead branches and suckers I choose not to revisit. During the course of the workshop with you I was able to come up with, "I ask people for money so that they can celebrate in the joy of helping others."  This thought took some time for me to actualize. I would do the meditation you offered us and look at my unhealthy thoughts and work on embracing my new ones. The big day came when I found myself in the position to ask someone for a donation to our not for profit organization.   Believe me I was practically chanting my new thought before the meeting. I did spend some time role-playing this in my head and on paper before meeting the donor. So, I asked them for 1 million dollars. (Not bad for a first try, huh?) The response I got was," we were thinking more around the $100,000 range, but if you need $1 million, we will throw a dinner party with our friends to help raise the money." This is just one example of where Managing Thought has improved my life.

Carl Clark, M.D.,
Denver, Colorado

On Setting a Vision for Our Children

I never thought about setting a vision for the daily life of my children. I can now look at all their activities and prioritize them and, in the case of my teenagers, help them decide how to spend their time.

Anonymous Mom, Detroit, MI

On Handling Limiting Beliefs

My first success occurred last Friday.  We had a major presentation against a competitor who has dragged my sales guys down into mudslinging each time in the past.  I used your "power of managing thought" coaching to handle the negative beliefs about them beginning with a pre-call huddle where everyone breathed deeply and specifically breathed out the anger and breathed in the power of the good things that we are going to do for this customer. Right off the bat, the customer made it clear they were keen to the conflict.  We were presenting last and they had picked up negative vibes from the competitor and hit us right between the eyes with "this other company offers the same thing you do, why are you different."  Needless to say, my team had been prepared for this and their thoughts were clear.  They stayed high tuned and the customer was left with no doubt about who was interested in them and who wasn't.   We stayed 100% interested in the customer's success and avoided the conflict, and kept ten people engrossed and involved until 6:00 PM on a Friday afternoon after they had been through a full day of presentations already.

Eric Brackett
Los Angeles California

On Dealing With Panic and Immobility

My cat was diagnosed with a chronic disease which will probably be what he dies from. There are actions to take and there are deteriorations which will inevitably happen. I use the concepts in the book to keep focusing on my love for all those around me, to shed old beliefs about having to save those I love, an unrealistic expectation, and the old belief that anything less than pure contentment in my pets is unacceptable and I am a terrible person if I let that happen. I focus on the beautiful flow of life in all beings around me and my active participation in that flow feeling joy daily as I observe this. This has helped me to shed the panic and immobility which the news of my cat’s health sent me into, and keeps me from going back there endlessly….a pattern which was well established in me prior to reading this book.

Karen Malley
Parent and environmental activist
Anaheim CA